Resilience and Reinvention - Coping with Early Onset Alzheimer's

Meet my designer friend, my fearless female and passionate soul, Franne Golde.  Read how Franne and her husband Paul Fox are bringing hope and awareness to Alzheimer's. We still have a few days left in the month of November to make a difference by shopping Franne's website, and for those of you who already have ordered, we are so very grateful for your purchase(s) and thank you for your support. Use my discount code GG35 until tonight Monday November 27th @ midnight. Happy & Grateful Shopping.

Franne & Paul Fox

Franne & Paul Fox

My name is Franne Golde. I'm a mother, wife, songwriter, clothing designer, author, advocate, caregiver, and founder of frannegolde.com.

I came to Los Angeles from Chicago in 1978 to pursue my career as a singer/songwriter. Within a couple of months, I wrote a song that was recorded by Diana Ross. It would turn out to be my first worldwide hit.

Since then, my songs have appeared on records that have sold over 100-million copies. I've worked with such superstars as Pat Benatar, Heart, The Pussycat Dolls, Celine Dion, Whitney Houston, Selena, Christina Aguilera, Faith Hill, Jody Watley and The Commodores. My song “Even If My Heart Would Break” was included on The Bodyguard, the biggest selling soundtrack of all time. 

The music business as I knew it started to change in the late ‘90s when people began downloading music for free. My earning power went down the tubes and my husband Paul, a successful record producer, was also feeling the heat. We tried to go with the flow and hoped for the best! I wrote a #1 Billboard Hit and Grammy Nominated song in 2005 for the Pussycat Dolls, but that would be my last.

At that time, my son’s school asked for my help with an upcoming fundraiser. In that and subsequent years, I contributed memorabilia from Sheryl Crow, Ringo Starr, and others, along with various concert tickets.

By my son’s senior year, I’d run out of favors, so for the annual fundraiser, I invested a thousand dollars to create a mini boutique in the school gym. I’d always loved fashion and people frequently asked me where I’d gotten my clothes. Often they were pieces I’d modified with scissors, needle, thread, ripping and knotting. I loved interacting with and styling all the moms and neighborhood drop-ins. By day’s end I had sold out.

Then I started selling clothing to friends out of my house, often designing what I couldn't find. I wasn’t trying to create a business, but I was having a blast and learning the ins and outs of finding fabric, patternmaking, samples, tweaking, cutters, sewers, marking, grading, and production. It was a whole new world and turning into an expensive hobby!

By 2011, the music business was hitting new lows and even successful songwriters were going broke. No one knew what the future held. Paul was having a difficult time finding projects as well. He wasn’t prone to depression, but he seemed anxious, forgetful, and sometimes confused, although he always had an explanation for everything. I attributed it all to the radical change in the music business and the attendant financial stress.

By late 2012 I knew something was seriously wrong with Paul. I never expected to hear what would take months to find out. In his mid-fifties, Paul was diagnosed with Early Onset Alzheimer’s Disease.

We have been through so much over the past five years - shock, fear, sadness, and endless tears leavened with a healthy mix of denial and hopefulness. We’ve been in support groups, visited our state capital and walked the halls of Capitol Hill, lobbying for increased research funding and improved access to care and support. We’ve done walks to raise money and awareness, served on the Board of the Alzheimer’s Association and currently sit on the Board of Music Mends Minds, a fantastic organization that brings meaning and pleasure to anyone with cognitive issues through the awesome power of music.

Paul has been able to accept this new normal with a glass-half-full mindset and hope. His yoga and spiritual practice is his salvation. He sees the beauty in everything and everyone and is a constant reminder of what’s right in the world. He has far fewer filters than ever and doesn't judge or complain. He is grateful and lives in the moment.

I struggle with tremendous grief when I allow myself to think that my future, with my best friend and the man I love, might not be as I once imagined. But mostly I follow Paul’s lead.

I knew I could no longer make a living writing music and it was hard to imagine doing anything else. It had been my life for over 35 years. Yet I had to take care of my family.

My only option was to sell my songs, the one thing that was all mine and that I’d worked so hard to nurture and protect. It was one the hardest things I’ve ever done.

The sale brought some cash, but I needed to get back to work. I couldn't just go out and get a nine-to-five job. It wouldn't begin to cover our expenses or satisfy my passion. 

I needed to reinvent myself and in a moment of revelation, I realized that I’d

already started doing just that. I had lots of samples of clothing, more significant, I had been working on what I considered to be, the perfect black pant. I made close to 100 samples till I got exactly what I was looking for.

Working became my therapy and I poured myself into it.

I launched frannegolde.com in August 2016 and was thrilled when the orders started coming in. A couple of months later I got an email that O, the Oprah Magazine expressed interest in seeing my pants. I couldn’t believe it, it was just like 1978 all over again, when Diana Ross gave me my first hit with, “Getting Ready For Love.”

My black pants were featured in the January 2017 issue of O and dubbed the “Magic Pant” by Adam Glassman, Oprah’s fashion guru and Creative Director of O magazine. This was followed by a feature on the Oprah segment of View Your Deal, on ABC. More orders poured in and my team and I were off and running.

As my business continues to grow, I still fight my grief and sadness every day -- and some days grief wins. But I know first-hand that there are silver linings. I feel them and see them regularly.

I'm grateful every day that I still have my husband and he is still able to do so many things. We treasure our time together, and though there are frustrations, we give each other unconditional love and support. I have my wonderful son, my family, and friends and I'm grateful to continue to be creative and find joy, every day. That’s really all you can ask for.

In support of Alzheimer’s Awareness month and in honor of my husband and my parents I’m donating a portion of the proceeds of my business to Music Mends Minds. While we wait for a cure…

YAPPY HOUR - THE NEW HAPPY HOUR

I'd like to introduce you to a new twist on "Happy Hour."  Meet the five happiest dog parents and the five coolest four-legged kids in town. As we approach the Thanksgiving holiday I thought it would be a real treat to introduce you to our yappiness happiness. Buster & I never thought life could be so happy when Yappy Hour rolls around. 

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There is no doubt when the ten of us are together,  no matter what's going on with us or the world, we truly realize how blessed we are that our 4-legged children have brought us together. As you read below you'll see how much we've shared together, our age ranges from 53 to 94 so there's a lot of wisdom and life experience between us all. One thing we have in common for sure besides our pooches... we love to travel, eat great food, drink fine wine, get a fine education on scotch and enjoy a perfect margarita that only Doreen can serve up. Meet our Yappy Hour Gang.

 Our happy place is Doreen and Joe's home, their door is always open, so much so we just suggest "why don't we go to Doreen and Joe's"  Occasionally we'll jaunt up to Shorty's house for a beautiful sunset, cocktails and discuss our "pawsitive" attitudes. Almost every day we meet at the same time, and like clockwork, when we begin to chime in with our texting, the kids are ready to go. Literally, if we're not out the door the stare-down begins, the toys are dropped at our feet and an occasional whine begins.

        Meet five reasons why you might want to begin your own Yappy Hour

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No leash needed, these kids have no interest in leaving each other's side. We do have rules, stop at all corners and No Street! 

Let's meet the gang

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Tony Williams & Shorty

When Janet asked me to jot down a few thoughts on our puppy playgroup I recalled the words of Stanley Coren, the famed chronicler, and author of many canine books. He writes: "In the thousands of years since humans first domesticated dogs we have genetically manipulated them to socialize easily and to show friendliness almost indiscriminately.”

How true these words are about our four-legged friends, yet that same willingness to "show friendliness almost indiscriminately" cannot be said of us, the two-legged human beings. Deep and meaningful friendships and true compassion for others sometimes get lost in today’s hustle and bustle… Yet somehow, some time ago (I think 6 years now!) our little group of dog lovers managed to find each other in a small park on the edge of West Hollywood and Beverly Hills. Our dogs linked us. Sweet Sadie, abundantly generous with her affection. Beguiling Bizou, deceivingly seductive and loving. Classy Collette, extraordinarily exquisite and elegant. And Beautiful Buster, a living teddy bear full of wisdom and passion. 

Each day with a wag of a tail or bark from the mouth, our dogs express their gratitude for their afternoon play time. This blog allows me to express my gratitude for our magical, loving and supportive group of friends - all connected initially through our dogs, yet now linked inextricably for life. In this season of gratitude, we all have a long list of items for which we must give thanks… but know that my Yappy Hour friends sit at the top of my list.

Hugs and licks to you each… and my best wishes for an amazing season of Gratitude to one and all!!!!

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Meet Keith Cox & Sadie

YAPPY HOUR!  What a concept, right? When I took a risk to take my beloved four-legged Spiritual Offspring, Sadie, to the unofficial park at the corner of Doheny Drive and Santa Monica, I never expected my life to be changed, enhanced, blessed, and enriched. The risk was because it is not unusual for the dogs to run and play off leash there. This “park” is adjacent to a very busy and congested intersection. The reward has been the familial relationship that has been created for both me and Sadie. What has now been dubbed “The Yappy Hour Crew” is, in fact, a coming together of 5 individuals (and occasional spouses) that share a deep bond? When we converge, (which we attempt most days) at what is HAPPY HOUR in most social settings, we are indeed happy. Yes, there is the occasional traditional concoction of an adult beverage, but the emotion of happiness transcends that. It is a result of our open and honest sharing, our mutual love of food, drink, and social activities. It is the result of our unconditional love for our canine family members, and it is because we are conscious, transparent, honest, loving, and even sometimes dysfunctional with each other. Familial, in other words. We have shared many highs and lows with each other. There have been birthdays, holiday, and even memorial celebrations of both humans and canines, moments of sitting vigil as a loved one is passing on, countless hours of discussion on food and drink, and great enjoyment of the attempt to perfect the margarita. And the consensus is that Doreen (or The Lady Doreen, as I call her) has the winning recipe. From a spiritual sense, the Universe brought us together at the perfect time and in the perfect setting. From a human sense, we have tended to the healthy nurturing of this familial bond and I believe we are all the better for it. Many have said it is the hardest club in Beverly Hills to get in… and that is true! Not because we are snobbish and exclusive, but because of the reverence for the beauty, love, connection, and sacredness we share as this little YAPPY HOUR family! 

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Meet Harvey Slosburg & Bisoux

For so many years I've had the privilege and the joy of spending time with my Yappy hour friends. Our friendships developed so organically over the years while sharing common interests, not just our dogs (kids), but so much of our lives. It seems we are all grateful for each other and the time we have together. When we are all together it makes this big city feel like a small town.  While walking together or throwing the ball, we share our daily lives, our joys, challenges, health, family, politics, and of course the “must try” new restaurants or cocktails. It seems what we share the most is gratitude for our friendships and the unique way we found each other. 

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Meet Doreen, Joe & Colette Wallach

We are 5 people that met accidentally at a small park that we made into an unofficial dog park. All of us came from different backgrounds, different religions, different sexual orientations, the only thing we had in common was that each of us had a friendly dog. Yet, we combined perfectly. Each of us brings a different outlook, wisdom, and sensitivity to our daily discussions.For example, just yesterday, our discussion started with:  How do you like to eat your corn on the cob? On the cob, roasted, cut off the cob, mixed with mayo and parmesan, how about combining corn with sun-dried tomatoes? Then the discussion continued to Astronomy, and how huge the universe is. Did we know that a Black Hole is a dense material that nothing can pass through? Our sun is 93 million miles away. The light from our star (the Sun) reaches us in 8 minutes. Light from the nearest star in the sky takes 4 years to reach us. How we are not even a grain of sand when compared with the size of the universe. And on to religion...

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We love to eat, drink and laugh and share our Netflix favorites.  We spend hours chatting about the newest restaurants, the coziest bar scene, are we staying in or going out for dinner. These discussions continue while our dogs are chasing the ball, eating mud, digging in the sand, eating bees, or just relaxing. 

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We love being together and making dinner, or just cocktail parties. For example, one member made a birthday party for his four-legged son and featured different food courses named after each of our pets. Colletuce cups (minced chicken lettuce cups) for my daughter, Colette. Split Bizoup (pea soup) for Bizou, Frozen Ice Cream Sadie-witches, and finally Chilled Buster Custard. Not all of our gatherings are for fun.  When my mother was passing, everyone came over to my home (my mom lived with me) not just to help me but also to help my mother pass to the other side.  We chanted by candle-light, and our metaphysical minister guided her through her passing. This was a  magical experience. Then we all had drinks and dinner. We laughed and cried. We had the best time.  My mother did not die that night as the doctors had predicted, (we all felt she enjoyed the party too much didn’t want to leave).  She held on for another couple of days. After my sweet Sophia passed (almost 18years old)  immediately we celebrated her life with tears and champagne. We are just there for each other. I really can not express how I feel except to say that I love each and every member of our Yappy Hour Family. Every single day is better because of you.

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Thank you, my dear friends, for your generous hearts and taking friendship & family to another level. The world's a better place because of you. Here's to more walks, more talks and a lot of Yappyiness! 

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  Happy Thanksgiving, I'm so grateful these spiritual pooches formed our tribe. In some way, on some level, I think they all knew they had a job to do with forming our "gang".  May we continue to grow young at heart and wiser together. Happy Thanksgiving, with gratitude...xoxo  Buster & Janet

 

Dig a little deeper

Dig a little deeper

Got a dog?  Why not put a group together, and create your own Yappy Hour. Getting outside walking and enjoying the company of your 4-legged best friend and making new friends can change your life. Pets create joy and bring people together, they can build communities, break down barriers between people and pave a way to a friendship you could have never imagined. 

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Here's to you Sophia Wallach, We love you!